Sometimes we need to vent. We need that to clear our minds. It does nothing to hear how stupid we are for staying with him or how bad of a person he is. Why do people feel the need to comment? I didn't remember asking. Isn't a friend the one person you can cry to just to cry? If I wanted criticism I would ask my mom. I won't go into that but most of us here can probably relate to a trashed family relationship, especially on the side of the codependent. I am referring to the post at Junky's Wife. I hope that she can shake it off. I had an ex friend, the Xanax queen, comment on my support of C in rehab. "Why is she still chasing him?"
It is worse than nails on a chalkboard. How can she say it? Why did she say it? She is currently fighting her own addiction to Ice and Xanax, upper and downer, while trying to keep custody of her kids. C is doing the first right thing he has done for and on his own in years. Why would she down it? Is she jealous? Even worse, is she right? Dammit it pisses me off. I mean really pisses me off. I have let that comment stew for a little over 24 hours now. Ugh. It is still there, in my head. I hate it. Hate it.
As much as I would like to see C and I making it I am not stupid. I got a fucking divorce from him. Even if we never screw again (please no!) then at least he is sober and can be the dad he wants to be. I hate hearing people say, "when he gets out and uses" or "he will leave and get messed up just like so and so". Is it any wonder why addicts relapse? There is no positive message for them. I am sorry that we as a society don't offer more positive feelings, not only to those that need it most, but to those that need it least. Maybe then people could shut their mouths until I ask them for it. I know a few of us that feel this way. I do appreciate comments from my fellow bloggers. I post on here to get feedback. I don't live my life out in the real world to get unsolicited feedback.
Thanks folks for the vent.