Saturday, June 16, 2007
Rainy, cloudy mood
I have a friend that is experiencing some of the same crap that I have gone through. It is so easy for me to tell her what to do. It is so easy to clear her life up for her. There isn't anything that I can say that will help her. She will have to figure it out for herself. It is sad, and black, and lonely and everything else bad. I remember feeling and saying the things I can hear her saying even now. I bargained, I issued ultimatums, I called names and controlled. I went crazy. She is going crazy. I can feel myself tense up just listening to her. It has infected my mind a little and now I am in a shitty mood. I will have to detach from her and let her live her own life. It hurts me to see it but what can I do? I have learned that there isn't anything that I can do to control another adult. She is no exception. At least now I realize how those around me must have felt when I lived through this crap. It is so easy to judge the situation from the safety and comfort of the bleachers. It is a whole other game on the field.
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4 comments:
It's hard, isn't it? Even sometimes reading folks' blogs, I realize I have to detach from what your husband is doing...crazy-ness...we codies really think we can fix the world!
Sometimes, though, like at Nar-Anon meetings, seeing people say all the stupid crap I've said and do all the stupid crap I've done is really helpful...makes me feel less crazy and alone. It depends on the mood/setting...
Tell your friend to get her butt to a Nar-Anon meeting! And hurry!
See? I'm offering advice to the friend of someone I only know electronically.
I'm a crazy ass ho!
I am going through something similar too -- it's hard. You've been there and you want to help -- you can see the pain and you know where it goes -- but they have to work it out for themselves.
P.S...
Come visit me! You've been tagged in a meme!
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